Posted on 5/19/2013

We asked students from a journalism class at Arizona State University what they wish their parents knew about Facebook. Here are the best responses from Shelby Payne, Kelly Nish, and Samantha Koukoulas. 

My generation of the 20-somethings joined Facebook because we so desperately wanted to belong to something other than MySpace. We were the guinea pigs for the social media prototypes– a weird transitional period not only for social networking sites, but for us preteens too.

After we joined, our parents soon followed us into the social media sphere. While we don’t mind connecting with our parents online, here are 6 things we wish our parents knew about Facebook.

1) A status is supposed to be meaningful and thought provoking, not a summary of your day. I don’t know how many times I have logged on to a status from my mom saying something along the lines of “Tennis all weekend, worked all day, house is a mess and I’m exhausted. Where do I start? I’m thinking a quick nap but probably won’t wake up. Maybe go to Zumba and get jumping.” I get it your audience is an older crowd of people that probably do the same thing, but these statuses can get repetitive. Try to post more than a just a summary.

2) The Search Bar. First off, lets clarify that the status bar on Facebook is not a Google search! I have seen way to many family members embarrass themselves this way. For instance when my aunt’s status read, “Justin Timberlake in Speedo picture.” Followed by “my apologies for the crude status, I thought this was a Google search.“ Facebook changes their layout every so often, so we can’t blame you, just do us a favor and familiarize yourself with it before use. Put it this way Mom, it’s like when you yell at Dad to read the IKEA directions before putting together furniture. Believe it or not it’s impossible without the instructions.

3) Picture comments are also public. If you see a picture of me and it reminds you to ask how I am doing, please do it by message. Other people that commented or liked that picture get notifications of your paragraph comments or simple questions. Just direct message or text me!

4) Speaking of the direct message… I can’t tell you how many times my mom or dad has asked me if a message was completely private. Again, I get that they’re just trying to cover themselves, but really guys? If it’s that secretive and private, just send an email. And remember that we use Facebook message as a communication medium; if you send a message, we will get it. Just last week my mom messaged me on Facebook, and then proceeded to text me telling me “I just sent you a message on FB. Love, Mom”– Really, mom?

5) Your News Feed is different from your Timeline. A Timeline is what everyone else can see about you on your Facebook. This includes your pictures, statuses, personal information, friends and family members. It’s a list of chronological events in your life that you have decided to openly share with all of your friends. A News feed is a chronological list of your friend’s recent events. A News Feed is similar to an online newspaper of things your “friends” are doing. When you post on my Timeline, it goes on my friends’ News Feed. All of those naked baby pictures and embarrassing childhood photos were hidden in the baby book for a reason. My Timeline is public, and people who visit it can see everything you post, so please think twice.

6) How to handle those friend requests. Oh, so many issues under one umbrella: parents please listen up. No, it is never, ever, okay to friend someone within five minutes of meeting them. More importantly, if it takes extreme searching/stalking to find the person, then don’t friend them.  Hey Mom! You can be friends with my friends on social media but it makes them really uncomfortable when you comment and like everything they post. More importantly, don’t poke anyone, ever. Facebook is great to stay in touch and share creatively, but you have a life outside of the computer. Pretend its 1980, step away from the machine and live a little.

What other Facebook crimes do your parents commit? Are you guilty of any of these?

Meet their professor, Francine

Self-described geek-to-human translator Francine Hardaway bought her first Apple product in the (very) early 80s. She started a weekly email list that evolved over the years, and is now known by people who still don’t read blogs as “Francine’s blog.” Francine’s real blog — for those “in the know”–is at Stealthmode Blog. She can also be found on LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter, Plurk, Identi.ca, and every other social network someone tells her about. And, oh by the way, she is a serial entrepreneur who counsels and invests in other startup entrepreneurs at Stealthmode Partners. Francine teaches at Arizona State University in the Journalism Department.

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